Haven't you heard? Backward is the new Forward. I don't mean it as a simple dualism, a contention between opposites. I mean it literally, in terms of linear direction. Conservatives are always calling for a simpler time, (the outright racist, brutally oppressive good ol’ days) Vegans are calling for the abolishment of civilization, (to a time when we killed each other for food and ate raw meat) and so on and so fourth. Progress according to these folk is a path walked backwards. It seems that the elite, trendy, en vogue, and all around arrogant assholes of high school and college have followed suit in regards to this logic, taking huge leaps backwards in the social caste system, while dressing it up as some cutting edge, hip bullshit.
Let's break away for a moment and put on some mini-skirts, three shades of eye shadow, boil some cough-syrup, and listen to music that has 155 BPM. Yes, I know what I'm describing does sound a lot like a typical broadcast of C-SPAN, but in fact I was trying to describe a rave. What the fuck is up with raves, and more importantly when the fuck did they become cool? It is a mystery that has eluded me for days. Don't you recall a time when listening to Trance was a mark of indescribable loserdom? Even that kid who wore math equation shirts knew to stay away from that shit. Obnoxiously flared pant legs, K-Swiss shoes, a metal link necklace, and the worst haircut you can possibly imagine. The same kids who watched Gundam Wing, Dragonball Z, Cowboy Beebop, and instead of watching porn involving three dimensional people they fucking watched Hentai. (By the way there is nothing wrong with watching anime, as long as there is a good story line, you have girlfriend, and you don't dress like the characters in real life.)
Back then Ja Rule was more widely accepted, and I tremble to think what would happen if history repeats itself in that regard. Ja Rule > Raves. Think about it. If I were a rave I'd be embarrassed. So my question is this: When did the attractive, elite, trendy, hipster and wealthy kids decide to go to raves? Why did this happen? When did this happen? This isn't based on some personal beef I have with either the trend-setters, or the pimple-faced ravers of old, it's rooted in complete confusion. Did alcohol not do it for them after a while? We all know they have had access to pot, cocaine, and the like, even E. There have always been clubs to go to even if you were under 21. So why was the transition necessary? Why did they adopt the customs of their social opposites/enemies? It goes against the very nature of the social hierarchy, I cannot even cite another time in history this has happened. Did the Egyptians start adopting the customs of their slaves after a couple of years? Did Queen Victoria Empress of
See it happened so quick that when confronted with it on myspace (thousands of images, of tweaked out girls scantily dressed, along with dim-witted sweaty smiling boys, under beating the pulsating neon lights ) I didn’t even question it! I was like oh, whatever that’s been going on for a while. . .wait what the balls, that’s Alice Deejay and Ferry Costen, when did this happen? My only coherent answer would refer to Amilcar Cabral’s theory of “class suicide.” Actually I’m just kidding that makes no sense at all. Perhaps it was boredom born out of immense abundance, maybe it was a conspiracy designed by house music producers looking to expand their market. Maybe there is some secret agreement between former Ranma ½ viewers, and guys who wear Affliction shirts, I just don’t know!
Whatever the source of this transition is, it is a dangerous force with numerous terrible implications. This is tampering with the very nature of things, the fabric of the universe. What if the elite group of kids move on to something else heralded by outcasts as sacred? What if they start to read comics? What if they start participating in study groups? What if they start watching Akira and liking it? The nerd underclass will be forced to rebel, and then things will get really ugly. I don’t really have a strong feeling of empathy in either party’s case. Nerds for the most part fucking suck and are usually extremely conservative, and the same can be said of the jocks who beat their ass in high school. Don’t get me wrong there are some really awesome nerds, but they usually are associated with the punk scene. Like Marx said in the manifesto,
“The history of all hitherto existing society is the history of class struggles. Freeman and slave, patrician and plebeian, lord and serf, guildmaster and journeyman, in a word, oppressor and oppressed, stood in constant opposition to one another, carried on an uninterrupted, now hidden, now open fight, a fight that each time ended, either in a revolutionary reconstitution of society at large, or in the common ruin of the contending classes.”
I’m voting for the second option.
